It’s constant and it never ends. It’s continuous as if it’s a breathing cycle. No matter how many times they crushed the trust you’ve given, you’ll end up believing in them all over again as if it never broke you. As if it wasn’t a reason why you lost yourself.
Listen, don’t come around deceiving someone by your sugar coated promises and venom like phrases like an orator who just merely practiced a wholesome speech to convince everyone. You don’t have a single idea how much it freights someone to be prone with vulnerability again.
It’s hard picking up your own shattered pieces, soaking yourself with your own tears at midnight, having the feeling of being unworthy, getting used with being lonely and starting all over again without the person who stood up for you.
It will bruise you as if you’re repeatedly nabbed by knives. You got used to be hurted with the same old feeling. It will numbed you as if it wasn’t a torture. Sometimes, you won’t see it tugging or maybe you’re in denial with the fact that it haunts you everytime.
Because all along, you’re stucked. You felt safe within his arms reconsidering of what he had done for you. You persuaded yourself that it wouldn’t end up crestfallenly, that this is gonna be another and different type denoument unlike with the others. But then, you watched him in his departure. It pinched you with the reality. And by that moment, you knew that you’ve been fooled again.
artwork: ilya viryachev